Why Founders Make Terrible Fathers (And How to Fix It)
Are your kids paying the cost of your success?
So many founders are absent fathers.
The very thing that makes you a kickass entrepreneur has made you a shit dad. You work your ass off. Pouring your energy into business with single-minded determination. Leaving your kids only the scraps.
Even when you’re home, you’re not really there.
The phone rings at 6pm, right as little Timmy beams up at you, eager to show off his latest Lego masterpiece. You answer it. “Just a minute, buddy.” Just a minute turns into 20. By the time you hang up, the moment’s gone.
Now you’re left explaining why some faceless voice on the other end of the line mattered more than your own kid.
You’ve become so focused on building an invincible business that you’ve become an invisible dad.
When building a business costs you your family
Neglecting your kids will break you.
In 2023, a client of mine who founded an energy startup stayed behind while his family moved overseas.
His wife won a scholarship to pursue her PhD in the US, but he remained in New Zealand to keep his company on track. His school-aged kids went with her.
While they were acclimatizing to a new life in Reno, he was working stupidly long hours, pitching investors, recruiting staff, and developing R&D projects.
His health plummeted
He stopped working out
Didn’t hang out with his friends
Spent $30k on takeout in less than 12 months.
And he missed his kids like crazy.
After one visit to the US, his son begged him to stay.
The scene at the airport was tragic. His son refusing to let go even as the last boarding call was announced. He fought back tears as he pried himself away from the devastated 9-year-old.
He was doing exciting work. Innovating in the energy sector.
But his seat at the dinner table was empty.
Are you making deposits or withdrawals?
Every time you prioritize business; you’re robbing your kids.
If they were a bank account, you’d be making a withdrawal. How many withdrawals can you make before they go bankrupt?
You say to yourself:
“Once the business is stable, I’ll work less and then I can be more present.”
But kids don’t wait. Every missed bedtime story. Every Lego rejection. Every time you’re not there to see their performance at the school play. Every “I’ll make it up to you”.
It compounds like negative interest.
You’re stealing from them.
Not money. They don’t care about that. You’re stealing the thing they value more than any other commodity — time with their dad.
Once that’s gone, it’s gone for good.
Will you be an ancestor? Or a ghost…
Your kids don’t give a fuck about your net worth.
Steve Jobs built a company that will outlive us all. At the peak of his success, he was worth $10.2 billion. But in his final, frail days before succumbing to pancreatic cancer, he confessed a heartbreaking truth to his daughter Lisa.
“I didn’t spend enough time with you when you were little”.
A voice that used to command boardrooms was now choked with regret.
“I wish we’d had more time…now it’s too late.”
Growing up, Lisa felt her father’s presence more in headlines than at the dinner table.
In the 10 years leading up to his death, he ignored her attempts to reconnect. Phone calls. Emails. He didn’t even acknowledge her birthday.
The Apple founder had been a ghost in his daughter’s life.
You can leave behind a fortune for your kids. But if that fortune is built on the debt of your absence, all they inherit is a deficit.
So what will it be? Ancestor? Or ghost.
You invest in everything — except your parenting portfolio
You pour money into business growth.
$15k for a business coach to optimize strategy
$8k for a mastermind to rub shoulders with high performers
$3k for VIP tickets to a tech conference
$500 on nootropics and sleep trackers to optimize your brain
But where’s your budget line for becoming an elite dad?
There isn’t one.
Because you assume fatherhood should come naturally.
Like some Matrix download straight into your brain.
But that’s bullshit. You weren’t born knowing how to pitch investors, scale a business, or read a balance sheet. You learned. You put in the reps.
Why should fatherhood be any different? Read how to stop treating fatherhood like a side hustle here.
Your business isn’t the project. Your kids are. They are your most important clients. And right now?
You’re ghosting them.
Start treating fatherhood like your most important startup.
You know how the story ends if you keep making the same choices.
A father who is a successful entrepreneur, but a ghost at home. You’ve seen it. Maybe you’re living it.
My client? He’s rebuilding his life now. Reconfiguring his routines so he has time to build Lego dinosaurs with his kids.
Investing and engage in their interests
Scheduling daily presence; make it non-negotiable
Asking open-ended questions to spark real conversations
Creating family rituals that become predictable connection points
This isn’t about “easy” — it’s about the right strategy.
I can show you. I help high-performing fathers optimize their presence and leadership at home — without sacrificing their business.
In 12 weeks, you’ll 10x your impact as a dad, building stronger, more meaningful connections with your kids while maintaining your business success.
This is your pivot moment.
👉 If you’re ready to start leading your family like you lead your company, my Fatherhood 3.0 framework will help you scale your parenting and 10x your relationships. Book a free consult with me HERE.
For more dadsplaining, check out my recent edition. I exposed the major red flags scaring women away after your divorce :)
